Is it possible…that maybe life wasn’t actually suppose to look that way?
The way you have it in your mind that looks all pretty and secure, where everyone is playing out a role that protects you from seeing what you’re afraid of. The way in your mind where other people show up as you think they should, where they act and breathe in a way that gives you a sense of security.
Is it possible that who you call a mother, isn’t really a mother, but rather a teacher who exposes an opportunity to practice love?
Is it possible that who you call an asshole, is really an image of someone in which you falsely relied on for your emotional stability?
“But don’t we need other people?”
Yes, but not in the way you think. What you need about them, is what they already are, not who you think they should be. You need them if they are there, present in your experience, just as the tree needs the soil, or as the apple needs the branch. But there will come a time when the apple falls, seemingly disconnecting with the branch. What good does it do, for the apple to blame the branch for letting go; was it even really the branches doing or choosing? Or was it life moving exactly as it should?
The only perceived problem is created by the apple, who still believes their security exists in the branch. So the apple tells stories about how the branch didn’t hold on long enough, and that becomes the justification for the apple’s fear. When in truth, the fear was only a self doubt. Not realizing that within the apple, exists many more trees, and NOW is the appropriate time for the apple to move on to the next phase.
“What if the apple isn’t ripe yet?”
It’s not an issue of ripeness from the perspective of human conditioning, for not all fruit is meant to be eaten by those who label what ripe means. An unripe fruit still contributes fully to its surroundings. It plays a vital role, that if taken away, would completely end the cycle of life.
Ripeness, is a judgment. It’s only relevant for when putting fruit in your mouth, but becomes completely irrelevant to its overall value in life. Even some fruit is deemed better tasting by some when it is labeled as unripe.
“What can I rely on, if not other people?”
Why is there this need to rely on anything, and for what?
You see, your question itself stems from an imagined reality that says you are without something. That says you need something that you don’t have, in order to be the completeness you search for.
Is it true though? In Life, in the reality of now? As you sit here with me, in your breath; tell me what you are missing that prevents you from simply being here, fully -attentively, -lovingly, and with peace. What don’t you have?
“In a weird way it seems I have too much, too many things I’m trying to bring with me.”
All that which we are trying to rely on, all the shapes, structures, and colors, are actually the hindrance that keep us from seeing that we are already complete. All of our thought, our blame, even our self professed spirituality, is all mental content that has nothing to do with the present moment at hand.
We have built up an idealized image of reality, that has yet to exists for anyone, and we worship it as if the fulfillment of its image would somehow make us whole. Totally not recognizing, that the forest could not be the forest, unless it existed as it does right now with all its perceived ugliness. The forest could not breathe, if it was not for the rotting trees. The Forrest could not shine brightly with colors of green, if not for the countless deaths of many nameless dead things.
The forest could not be, if not for the sting of the honey bee. The forest could not thrive, if not for the perceived chaos that exists inside. The forest is where life lives, where life dances and then starts over again. Without judgment, without any inclination to label anything as good or bad, or right or wrong, what exists is the serenity of the breeze that allows it all to go on.
This is what we are asked by life to trust in. The breath that allows us to be here. This, until death, you will never be without. This, is the only thing that will always be by your side, the miracle that you already are.